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Awareness Magazine
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What Is a Soul Mate?

By Jenny Smedley


Most people automatically think in terms of a partner, chemistry, a life-long union, so they are often disappointed, because this is not always the case. People also often believe that there is only one soul mate for them in the entire world. This is inaccurate too. It’s possible to have many different soul mates of different kinds.

What kinds of soul mates are there?

There are opinions on how many kinds of soul mates there are, everywhere you look, but my experience has made me believe in four main kinds:


This is what most people picture when they think of perfect soul mates. This is someone who feels like half of you. Whenever they’re absent, your life almost seems to go ‘on hold.’ They know what you’re thinking and they offer you total unconditional love. There will be no battlefields — maybe minor skirmishes as both parties have to learn lessons, but this partnership truly embodies the cliché that together, two people are greater than the sum of their two parts.

There will be no unfaithfulness, because this love they feel goes right down to soul level, and it will be impossible for them to hurt each other, and indeed they will never desire another anyway.

However, not everyone will find this kind of soul mate in every life they live, because the strong dependency that can be formed isn’t always a good thing, and might not be right at this particular stage of our existence. Because of this we may live some lifetimes apart from our Eternal Flame, just to make sure that we learn to rely on ourselves and not on someone else.


Twin soul mates are one step down, in a way, from Eternal Flames, and can be the most confusing type of all, because love is certainly and obviously there between them. They can be very alike in many ways. They seem familiar right from the first meeting, and indeed they are familiar, because you will always have known them before, in other lifetimes. They make you feel comfortable, because in a past life they were probably your friend or partner and it’s tempting to think you can just take up where you left off with them. It’s an instinctual pull, and sometimes it’s right.

But this is where the trouble can come, because often they are just there to help you out, and often not meant to be your lifelong partner. Not realizing this, and perhaps being pressured to commit by social peers, you might marry this twin soul and then further down the line find you need to part. Or you can be meant to be partners for a short time, perhaps to create specific children, and once those children have been created the need to be together fades.


There is a saying, ‘When the pupil is ready, the teacher will appear,’ and it’s very true. Soul mates of this kind will some-times come into our lives, usually temporarily, to enable us to learn something vital to our soul’s progress. They won’t normally be a partner, but this can happen. The relationship can be challenging and difficult, and the lesson can be harsh. However, once the les-son has been given, this person will sometimes vanish as mysteriously as they appeared, and this can cause upset and con-fusion.


These people can step into your life, sometimes to just say a specific thing, or bring comfort and companionship when you’re feeling alone, or need some advice to help you make a tricky decision. They’re often lifelong friends once they appear. They think the same way as you and are always there for you, but you never see them as potential partners. They’re often the opposite sex, and yet there is no sexual chemistry between you. This is a true platonic relationship, and this kind of soul mate isn’t even always human.

During my work as an international columnist, the most common questions I’m asked by far, are ones like: Who is my soul mate? Will I ever meet my soul mate? How can I tell if I’ve met my soul mate? Did I know my soul mate in a past life? Why did the man/woman I thought was my soul mate leave me? Do I have more than one soul mate?

Jenny Smedley is a qualified past-life therapist, angel intuitive, best-selling author of 20 books on all matters spiritual and an award-winning lyricist. She has appeared on numerous TV and radio shows and is a regular columnist in four magazines in three countries. Her advice has been sought by many over the years on the subject of soul mates, and she has been able to direct them in their quest to find true love. Jenny was recently voted, ‘Favorite Angel Intuitive’ in the worldwide 2013 Awards, winning with an amazing 69% of the total votes. Find out more at Published by Piatkus, “Soul Mates” is available in bookstores worldwide.